“He’d Steal a Coin from a Deadman’s Eyes“

In the Time of COVID. Day 27

April 14, 2020

“He’d Steal a Coin from a Dead Man’s Eyes”

There are some anry cusses and low-down scallawags in this world. We, out west, have a body of dime novels and decades of B westerns that attest to the fact. You got your Highwaymen and Alley Cats, your Rollers, and Road Agents. There are gangs of Desperados and corrupt cattle barons. There are claim jumpers and cattle rustlers, your train robbers and your gun for hire psychopaths.

The victims are hard-working sod busters that just want a little fence around their place but they have no defenses against the greedy and corrupt black hats that ride the range, jump the claims, steal the water, redirect the railway, or bush-wack the stage coach.

Enter the Paladin, the chivalrous loner with a fast draw and the morals of a saint. He stands against tyranny. He defends the hapless and rids the territory of evil forces. At the end, White Hat still crisp and clean, he rides off in the sunset while little boys and love sick maidens lean against corral posts. The little western main streets are back to bustling business.

How do I know this to be true? I spend Saturday at the matinees . I loved the El Rancho theater. 3 westerns, a cartoon and a news reel. I got the straight scoop. I learned about good and evil and how there was always someone willing to stand up and defend the weak.

At home I read Zane Grey, and Robin Hood and followed Prince Valiant in the funnies. I read Tarzan of the Apes and Tarzan and the Jewels of Opar. I knew there were good guys. In all the stories , every one of them , good triumphed over evil . It was a certainty.

Now I hear some State Governors who have arranged PPE shipments for their desperate health care workers are having their supplies bush-wacked Federal Highwaymen (FEMA). The Feds ride for an evil orange-skinned varmint who would steal the a coin from a deadman’s eyes.

I hear that a significant shipment of PPE is scheduled to arrive at an unspecified port in an unspecified western state and that governor is amassing his National Guard to protected it from plunder.

We know how to get the drop on the bad guys out west. Folks, Just stay inside , duck low and and let the Governor meet the bad guys at high noon.